Shut up.

Oh my God stop talking. Really. "Oh my God." "Oh my god." "Ohmagawd." "Omg." How stupid are you? Cut out your tongue if you can't keep it restrained. It'd look better than your pink tongue ring anyway. Stop putting so much gel in your hair that I could take a sledgehammer to it with no effect. Lose the heart shaped, gold painted, plastic earrings. The jeans with the holes, the fake nails, the make up. Stop. Just fucking stop. Even if you're not vain, stop talking. Everyone stop talking. You idiots need to stop talking. Superiority complex aside, you have nothing in your head that the rest of us don't have more of. So, silence.

Now. Listen. Take a deep breath and let it back out. Think some real thoughts, write a paper or two. Read some books and get back to me when you know more. Take some time out from your masquerading and be a real person.

You don't need to smoke or drink to be cool. You don't need to sleep around. You don't need to be atheist or condescendingly religious; just what makes you happy. You don't need to have your boobs hanging out and you don't need stiletto heels. I'll respect you more if you have on pajamas and a full bag of books. Read What is Enlightenment? by Kant or Faust by Goethe or A Mathematician's Apology by Hardy. Everyone will take you more seriously that way.

So don't be stupid. You don't have to be smart -- some people can't be smart -- but really, no one has any excuse for stupidity. No excuse to be vain or vapid or inane. You're better off dead if you really think that's what's best for you.